Memories
by KathBell
Summary: An all too familiar scene brings back unwanted memories and the team discover more about Ryan's unfortunate past. Part 2 of the 'Angel' series  Can Stand-Alone .


_**Authors note: Please review and thanks for the review in the first installment of this series. **_

_**Disclaimer: Own Amelia, Sophie, and Kate 1+2! **_

_**Song/s: First song in **itallics only **is 'Welcome to my life' by Simple plan. Second song is 'Perfect World', also by Simple plan.**_

_**Series: Part two in the 'Angel' series but can stand-alone! Might not make much sense though! **_

_**Angel of fate.**_

_To be hurt, to feel lost. To be left out in the dark. To be kicked when you're down. To feel like you've been pushed around. To be on the edge of breaking down and no one's there to save you._

_You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay _

It had been a month since Amelia had joined the team, and she had been a big hit with everyone – especially Ryan and Natalia. She didn't know why, but Ryan and Amelia got on like, well, her and Eric did. But the second she mentioned the idea to Eric, he just shyed away.

Definitely something wrong if Eric doesn't tell you. She just shook her head. Ryan had mentioned something about them being partners for over six years in New York, but those two, it was as if they were brother and sister.

Eric had also flinched at that.

But there was no record of Amelia being married, so it was obvious she was not Ryan's sister... Maybe they had been adopted... Oh shut up. You'd know if Ryan had been adopted.

**I used to think that I was strong.**

"Hey Calleigh." Amelia smiled, walking into the break room. That had to be the best fake smile and fake happiness Calleigh had ever seen, maybe her and Ryan had an argument, that would mean that Calleigh would probably find out why they were so close.

"Hey Amelia, where's Ryan?" She knew that they lived in the same apartment block and that they usually drove each other to work. For one of them, especially Amelia who was not fond of driving (why she didn't know), to turn up to work without the other one or two steps behind them was literally unheard of.

"He's got the day of." She answered quickly. Do not ask why. Please Calleigh, do not ask why because I hate lying to you.

"Oh," Calleigh was still confused. He had a day off and he didn't drive Amelia into work anyway? "Is he okay?"

"Yeah." Fake smile again. "Why wouldn't he be?" She laughed. Lying. It sucked. Amelia decided on that the second she had started. It was hard not to mention the fact that Ryan was married. It was hard to not mention Sophie. She managed to do it though. She had managed to pull Eric away from Calleigh and beg him not to tell anyone what she had let slip.

**Until the day it all went wrong.**

"_Eric." It had been a day. A day, and in that one stupid day she had nearly destroyed everything that Ryan had worked to create. She now stood here, over a week later, trying to fix it."What I said before, about me and Ryan." He looked uncomfortable as he nodded. "You cannot tell anyone, not even Calleigh. You haven't told her have you?"_

"_No." _

"_Good. Look, thinking about her... It's painful, for both me and Ryan. It was an amazing time, but it was painful. People got hurt. People died. You cannot tell anyone about her, and how me and Ryan are related. We were partners in New York, if anyone mentions why we are so close which I hope they won't.. I hate gossip." She shook her head. "Sorry, but I have to do this. You tell any living – or dead – soul and I will track you down, break every single bone in your body with great ease – and trust me, that is a very painful process – before stabbing yo multiple times and leaving you to bleed out in another country. I can do that. Do you understand?" She was serious. Well, not completely serious. She was truthful. She knew how to break bones without hitting arteries, and she knew from one painful, and terrifying experience, how bad it is for the captive person. She wouldn't do it to him, but she would cause some serious pain regardless of protocol. She had to hide her smirk. He looked terrified. _

"_Yes." _

"_Good. Thanks for your help." And with that she walked away. _

"_God Wolfe, you have crazy friends." He shook his head. Crazy was an understatement. _

She had managed to keep it a secret. "Just wondering, Calleigh answered with a smile. Eric walked in and noticed Wolfe wasn't here. He was about to complain when he saw a certain terrifying female making coffee.

"Amelia, keep away from the coffee." She raised her eyebrows. "Wolfe ordered me to keep you away from coffee. He said you cannot be trusted with a gun, a car, or being able to move, when on coffee." He laughed. For some reason, she had winced at the name Wolfe, and looked upset.

"Yeah, well, today is a crappy day. I didn't sleep so I am going to have coffee whether you like it or not. It's not like you can tell Ryan without having multiple bones broken." Calleigh smirked, she was used to the death threats and pain threats that Amelia sent Eric. She laughed even more when he looked terrified.

"You didn't sleep?" He questioned. It looked true. She looked like crap. Her hair was tied up in a messy bun, she was wearing barely any make-up, and she had faint bags under her eyes from sleep deprivation.

"Didn't I just say that?" She subconsciously rubbed the scar she had running down her thigh. Both Calleigh and Eric noticed this and shared a worried glance.

**I think I need a miracle to make it through**

The group of three arrived at the crime scene. "What have we got?" Eric asked Tripp while taking in the scene in front of him. One person inside a – to put it simply – destroyed wreck of a car. Amelia looked like she had gone thirty shades paler than she already had been as she looked at the bodies. Eric put it down to her lack of sleep, and the fact that the car was full of blood. She's usually good with blood, an annoying voice in the back of his head told him.

"One DB, Kate Sanders." Another shade paler. Amelia looked like she was frozen to the spot. Tripp also noticed this and raised an eyebrow at Eric, who just shook his head. "Been battling cancer for five years, according to her husband," He nodded his head in the direction of an extremely upset man. "She had just found out that she was in remission and was off to her friends grave – who had died of the illness – when she was hit by a car. The guy in the other car is supposedly unharmed and- Carter!" Amelia was swaying dangerously, and looked like she was about to collapse. Calleigh and Eric were the closest to her and caught her before she hit the floor. They then lowered her to the ground so that she was sitting with her back supported by the Hummer.

"Amy? Amelia, can you hear me?" Calleigh asked while Tripp called for medical assistance. "Call Ryan. He might know what's wrong with her." Worry was spread all over Calleigh's face, and it only increased when she heard Amelia's hyperventilated breathing. "I think she's having a panic attack."

–

Ryan answered his phone quickly, expecting that it would be Amelia asking if he was doing okay for the thousandth time in less than three hours. "Wolfe." Just in case, he used his normal answer-monologue in case it was someone.

"Ryan, it's Amelia." He felt all the colour drain from his face at Eric's words.

"Is she okay? What happened?"

"We don't know, we got onto the scene, 33 year old woman killed in a car crash, battling cancer, and she just went pale and we think she's having a panic attack. The medics are trying to calm her down but we don't know what's wrong."

"What was the vics name?" He heard his voice shake.

–

Eric was surprised. Ryan sounded like that one description had just ruined his day. "Erm, Kate Sanders." He heard a small sigh from Ryan.

"It's Kate's friend. My, her Kate. Amelia's sisters Kate. She died in the same circumstances coming to the hospital." The one you were married to. "Kate and Kate 2 met in the hospital while having chemo, hit off immediately, not like you couldn't if you shared a room with that person but... Tell her that Kate would want her to calm down, and that I'm on my way." Was that the sister that Ryan was married to? He started to wonder, but was distracted as medics started shouting. Remembering Ryan's advice, he turned back to Amelia. The medics moved out of the way, after a glare from both CSI's.

"Amelia! Kate would not want you to act like this. She would want you to calm down. Ryan is on his way." Amelia finally made eye contact. A few minutes passed and her breathing had slowed down slightly as she shook her head adamantly.

"Don't... Let.. Ry... See her." Her breathing was still too fast for the medics likings, but it was better than earlier.

**I wish that I could bring you back.  
**

"Okay, we won't." Eric answered with a smile. "I think you're gonna have to tell us everything now, please don't break my bones." Eric joked half-heartedly.

Amelia smiled. "Just keep... Ryan away from... Kate 2 and it's.. up... to him... Hurts him... more than me..." Eric nodded. Calleigh had been sitting there with a confused look on her face. Was this Kate person the vic, or was that Kate 2. "We'll... explain, when Ry... Here, Cal..."Amelia continued.

"Okay, you just try to breathe and if you ever do that to us again, I will break your bones instead." Calleigh smiled in relief. Another car pulled onto the scene and a very worried looking Ryan stepped out.

"Don't let him see her." Amelia stressed, trying to stand up.

"Stay. Her body is covered up." Eric ordered strictly.

**In a perfect world  
This could never happen **

"Are you okay?" Ryan asked, finally reaching them. Amelia nodded and smiled.

"Memories, and these two are gonna want to know." Calleigh glanced at Ryan hopefully. So did Eric.

"Fine." Ryan answered and gave her a small smile. The smile, however, disappeared as he turned back to his team mates. "Amelia had a sister, Kate, not that one-" He added seeing Calleigh and Eric's widening eyes. "She was also my wife." The looks of pity that both Amelia and Ryan hated were sent at Ryan. "She was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumour. It spread to her liver, and her lungs." Amelia heard the strain in Ryan's voice and took over.

"She was beating it. The night she... died, she was on her way to chemo and, some drunk guy drove in her car. I was at Ry's, I moved in there when Kate got the cancer, cos' Ryan was in hospital at the time." The newest look of confusion of the other CSI's faces made Amelia groan. "You tell them nothing, do you?" She shook her head. "Ry took a bullet for me out in the field. Idiot. That was how we found out about Kate having cancer, she hallucinated him while he was in surgery, and her colleagues found her passed out on the floor. She was a doctor." A proud smile fell on Amelia's face. "Anyway, we got the call saying that Kate was in surgery and we went to the hospital and... she didn't make it." Calleigh and Eric were made speechless by the revelation. "She... She was amazing, funny." Ryan had a small smile on his face as his eyes fixated on a spot on the floor. Anything to avoid the pity looks, he thought. He was glad Amelia didn't tell them about Sophie. He didn't think that he could take it. "Smart, she was the smartest one of us all." A small smile finally made it's way onto her face.

**In a perfect world  
This could never happen **

After Kate had died, they had found out that she had kept a diary. It had stated everything. Where she wanted to be buried, and on what day. It also included messages to Amelia, Sophie, Kate 2, and Ryan. Kate had wanted to be buried in Miami, she had wrote that she wanted to be near the sun, and the sea and the fun. Away from the cold, and the dark, and the death. Amelia had added in her mind. So that is what they had done. They had buried her in Miami City Graveyard. Sophie next to her. Ryan visited nearly every day, either after or before work. That was where both he and Amelia stood today. They looked at the grave. In Amelia's left hand was a two roses, one red, one white. Her right hand was tightly gripped by Ryan's. She put the red rose on Kate's grave. Kate had always liked red roses. She then put the white one on Sophie's before wiping the tears from her eyes.

**In a perfect world  
You'd still be here **

_**A/N: Reviews would be lovely. **_


End file.
